Busy but relaxing

Yeah. i know my title sounds weird. How can someone be busy and relaxing at the same time? Well, it seems now that there are too many assignments to be completed and 2 more exams coming up which i haven't even start to read. So you say, am i BUSY but RELAXING?

I suppose to be very stress up for all this like how i was during previous semesters. But this semester, i couldn't find any mood to study. Maybe it's because i will be going for Industrial Training next semester.

I couldn't find anything to do at home, but i will not touch my books. Even how i told myself that i need to study, i just fought wit myself. I didn't want to study. I want to play my computer, go shopping, karaoke, clubbing, anything other than studying. But still, i'm a good girl. The most i only went for Yumcha and mostly only with Thomas coz we are both the boring ones with nothing to do. Others that i have listed above, i don't even have the chance for those. As i told you, i'm the only one who is BUSY but RELAXING.

So, speaking of internship. I'm kind of Excited and feeling SCARED. Well, being a 22 year old girl, i have never work before. YES! I HAVE NEVER WORK BEFORE! During secondary school times, every holiday my friends will be out working and earning their money. And everytime when they talk about work, what they did during holiday, i could only stare, listen and couldn't even say anything. that sounds pathetic.

I wanted to work. But since young, my parents are very protective of me. I'm like those animals that are protected like turtles. I never took a public transport myself. I don't even dare to take the LRT but now i've improve a bit. With my parents so protective of me, i tend to be someone who would rely on people, or to say not so independent. My parents send and fetch me to school everyday. And going out with friends is a NONO. Every holiday i will be at home, eating, watching tv, sleeping. I asked my mum to let me go and work during the holidays, she didn't allow. The most, i will help out at my dad's company, and the workers there alwiz calls me ANAK BOSS. Sounds like a rich girl, but then now i think being the ANAK BOSS also not that good. Go out and work who wanna call me ANAK BOSS???

So after i've came to study in Melaka, finally i'm out from that protected world, into a free world. I need to learn to take care of myself and i started going out with friends. During Junior time i still alwiz call my mum and tell her of my problems and how to solve them. But slowly i growed and know things sometimes must be solve on my own, and i shouldn't alwiz ask my mum. And it really feels nice when i started to solve my own problems.

There's one time, i thought of working and my friend asked me to join her to promote something. I was happy to think that i could earn my own money. And so i accepted, but then after that i rejected again. 1st i was scared, i have never work before and was really scared. but i know everything needs to have a start. 2nd reason for rejecting, i have some time clashed wit my classes. And the 3rd reason and also the main reason, that stupid supervisor said something that i really didn't like to hear. She ask me whether i have work before and surely i said no. And than she look at the others and said very loudly " This one leh! is called NO EXPERIENCE LA!" I don't know why she must say it in that way, but it reli hurts me. I thought of not going to class to go for the job, but in the end, i told my friend that i don't wanna go anymore, i wanna go for my class.

Yes i have no experience. Yes i'm a very protected girl. And no, i do not like it this way! i HATED that person to talk to me in that way. NO ONE OTHER THAN MY PARENTS COULD TALK TO ME THAT WAY! Ok, i know i sound like a rich brat, but i'm not. I'm just too protected that i could not accept people talking to me this way.

After that incident, whoever offer me jobs, i tend to reject. I don't want to hear people saying those things to me again. But hey, i know i'm wrong of thinking like this. Coz everything has a start. 1st people will say you have no experience, the 2nd time, i might be the one saying others have no experience. But still, i tend to reject.

The interview for my internship went smoothly. No words like no experience came out from the interviewer's mouth. And they were very nice. So, i will keep my 1st time for my internship. I'm really excited on what i would learn, who i would meet. And its another big step for me, for being more independent.